Learning to Let My Heart Break

Feeling Lost Recently, my heart has been breaking a lot, and it hasn’t felt great. In fact, at times I wondered if something were seriously wrong with me. Unable to shake a heaviness that didn’t seem to match my circumstances, I finally asked God what was wrong. “Why do I keep having bad dreams, God? […]

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The Strength to Persevere

It’s been awhile since I’ve blogged, but after a two-week trip to the States, a move to a new apartment, and a pretty major hair cut.. I’m back! New Beginnings Right in line with my Year of New Beginnings, I moved into a new apartment last week! Woohoo! It’s an amazing home with a lot […]

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Some Lessons From the Middle of the Process

I haven’t been blogging much the past month, because I’ve been doing a lot of personal processing. A lot. My thoughts, beliefs, hopes, fears, insights, and regrets have all been tangled together like a giant knot that is slowly getting loosened. And from that mess, I didn’t feel I had anything to share. I’m still […]

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Pretending to be Strong

Sometimes I lie to myself and pretend I am strong. I pretend I am capable of taking care of myself, that I know what I need and am capable of obtaining it. I think it’s a survival instinct most of us fall back on. When we are hurt, when we are disappointed, when situations collapse […]

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Good Friday: The Reason for Suffering

Salvation is a free gift. Yet it came at a great cost. I used to think my part was to simply receive the gift. Which is true. A gift isn’t something you earn. You simply open your hands and receive it. However, I found myself a little confused as to what this gift entailed. I thought that since Jesus took on […]

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Where He Is

This morning I told God I simply wanted to be where He was. “If you’re in the storm, then I want to be there too,” I told Him earnestly. I’ve been in a bit of a storm lately, but it occurred to me this morning that just because life is rough doesn’t mean that isn’t exactly where God is. God can be […]

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Early Morning Prayer: When You are Willing to Pay a Cost

I am not a morning person. As in, I usually sleep through mornings. So you could say we’ve become unacquainted. But this week, I decided to go to early morning prayer. In Korea, early morning prayer is a staple of the church. Crowds of middle-aged women (and others) faithfully arise with the sun to seek God’s face and intercede […]

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Falling (why I’m thankful for mistakes)

I used to be deathly afraid of making mistakes. Not only as a straight-A student, not only as a classical pianist, but also as a person. I pictured this ideal of who I was supposed to be and found the idea of slipping outside of those imagined lines unbearable. It has taken a lot to learn to accept the messiness […]

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